My contribution to today’s geeky online defense of free speech, for reasons I discussed here, here, and here:

As a Christian it’s difficult to deal with the question of capital punishment. I don’t believe “Thou shalt not kill” is a commandment that extends to governments who provide fair trials, but that’s not something I’m generally confident enough to shout from the rooftops. Then I see a story like this appalling one from Cleveland:

A convicted rapist was charged with multiple murders on Tuesday after police dug up 10 corpses at his home, which produced a stench of death in the depressed Cleveland neighborhood.

That no innocent should ever be put to death by the state is, to my mind, the most convincing argument against the death penalty. So long as we remain human, there will be tragic cases where people are convicted of crimes they did not commit.

Neighborhood residents said they avoided Sowell, who was released from prison in 2005 after serving 15 years for raping a pregnant woman.

Anthony Sowell got a second chance, and he used it to rape and murder women. I can think of no punishment too cruel or unusual, but a series of injections guaranteeing he can never rape or murder again seems to be in order here.

In a conference call today with religious leaders from around the country, President Obama framed the debate over health insurance reform in terms of right and wrong: anyone who hearts big government is right, and anyone who doesn’t is wrong. Trouble is, President Obama is wrong about practically everything.

“These struggles always boil down to a contest between hope and fear,” he said. “That was true in the debate over Social Security, when F.D.R. was accused of being a socialist. That was true when J.F.K. and Lyndon Johnson tried to pass Medicare. And it’s true in this debate today.”

This is President Obama’s argument? If throwing additional tax dollars and half-baked regulations at a serious national issue passes for hope these days, I’ll take fear. Look at Social Security and Medicare! Don’t you wish everything could be managed to insolvency by Washington bureaucrats? President Obama does.

The Weekly Standard has an Obama quote that’s not included in the NYT story:

“You’ve heard that this is all going to mean government funding of abortion. Not true. These are all fabrications that have been put out there in order to discourage people from meeting what I consider to be a core ethical and moral obligation–and that is that we look out for one another, that I am my brother’s keeper and I am my sister’s keeper. And on the wealthiest nation on earth right now, we are neglecting to live up to that call.”

“I am my brother’s keeper,” “we are neglecting to live up to that call” – does President Obama have any concept of Americans as individuals? I feel bad for the self-proclaimed socialists out there; Obama keeps annexing more and more of their worldview as bipartisanship/pragmatism/realism/centrism/whatever we’re calling it this week.

The Weekly Standard story goes into more detail about the abortion question and the general tone of Obama and Congressional Democrats lately. Republicans are stifling debate – on a bill that Obama wanted to pass weeks ago, before anyone had even read it. Republicans are lying about what’s in Obamacare – although the Mad Libs legislation being pushed by statists would leave politicians to fill in the blanks while taxpayers foot the bill.

I didn’t mean for “Mad Libs” to have a double meaning in that last sentence. Looking at it now, though… that may accidentally be the wittiest thing I’ve ever written. A low bar to clear, I know.

Got back a little while ago from the LIVESTRONG Summit Presidential Town Hall on campus, and when I went out back to water the plants something caught the corner of my eye: a fluffy white tail, hopping away from the flowerbed. Little bugger hopped just over the property line – we’re talking a matter of inches – and watched me water what I thought were my plants, but which may more accurately be described as his.

Regarding the Town Hall, it was pretty good. I went to see John McCain and Lance Armstrong in person, and was impressed by both. It’s no wonder Obama doesn’t want to be within a country mile of McCain without a prompter. Sure he’s a stubborn old codger, but he’s also sharp and quick of his feet and brimming with experience. He had my vote before and he certainly has it now, although I could have gone without mentions of McCain-Kennedy and McCain-Feingold.

In the vein of continuity (is that what this is?), continued prayers for the Roeths and Chivingtons. I don’t know how long the page will be accessible, but there’s a good article from the 7/18 edition of the Troy Daily News following Carrie’s passing.

Further continuity still, the book o’ Faces tells me the following:

Griffin House’s performance for The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson is now scheduled for Friday, July 25th.

Tune your TV and watch Griffin performing “The Guy That Says Goodbye To You Is Out Of His Mind” on national TV.

There you have it – a reason to watch Craig Ferguson. Who, apparently, is still on the air? Griffin will be on Conan soon enough, by golly!

Please pray for Carrie Roeth, who loves God and has remained – through a fight with an extremely rare cancer that has gone on for years – one of the most kind and devoted people I know. She is in critical condition and the outlook is bleak.

Pray for Carrie’s family, her husband, and her son. May God bless them in a dark time and may we take refuge in his will.

I couldn’t sleep much last night, having made the inexcusable mistake of eating a donut far into the fourth quarter. I got up and walked over to the kitchen table thinking, “it’s probably too late to eat this donut,” but then I did it anyway.

So, while I was trying to sleep and wrassling around with my covers instead, I was tangling also with those weird semi-conscious thoughts that seem to surface when I’m almost awake. I got thinking about a girl I had a crush on my sophomore year of high school, and I thought of a conversation I’d had earlier in the day with a friend. I wondered what, exactly, has always allowed me to torture myself over girls who will never be more than half interested in me at best. I wondered why I feel like all my time in general is wasted.

And immediately, thanks to my awesome donut-powered brain, I knew that my stubbornness was to blame. I’ve got this cloudy idea of how a girlfriend should look and behave, and when I meet a girl who seems to fit the bill I behave in ways that’d put your average romantic comedy to shame. If you’ve seen any romantic comedy ever, you know that inducing shame is no small feat. And as for my overall achievements/lack of achievements, I arbitrarily choose something that seems good and then I go for it. When I get to whatever “it” was… meh. What else is there to do?

From that little realization I bounced (again, thank you donut) to another thought: I’m a poster child for the Dr. Phil “Be true to yourself” line of feelgood mumbo-jumbo. Such a huge portion of the decisions I make I base on what I want, to the exclusion of anything else. If for a moment I feel selfish or greedy, I consider the way I’ve lived – no drugs or sex or drunken misdemeanors – as if I’ve earned something. As much as I’ve been given, it’d be hard to earn anything.

But just like junk science, junk psychology is hard to avoid and harder to get rid of. So we get talk shows and dramas and even entertainment on the less-fuzzy end of the chart offering simple truths: Believe in yourself! Be true to your heart! You’ve got to put yourself first sometimes! …What a load of yuppie crap. You could cover every point as easily by saying “don’t be a lousy fraud,” but that doesn’t sound cute. Stupid as it is, how often have I made choices this way without thinking? Even my skull is not thick enough for me to go through life immune to prevailing advice and attitudes.

I can’t help but think of the silly chorus to an old Switchfoot song:

Go, go where you are
Anchor your roots underneath
Doubt your doubts
And believe your beliefs.

As faithful a Christian as I consider myself on my most pompous days, I tend to go around believing other people’s beliefs. Jesus didn’t use his brief time in the spotlight to say “Hey, dudes, God sent me here to remind you – be, like, true to yourself, man.” He insisted that we be dead to ourselves, and though I know that’s how I should think it’s easy to be true to me instead of… well, the Truth.

It comes back around to the simplest questions – if you’re going to believe in a god, I don’t know how you’d go with any other. If you’re not, “believe in yourself” is kind of the default option, kind of the source for all my failures, and kind of useless advice.

Everyone does. Whether you’re a homeless drug fiend or a philanthropic billionaire, we all need God. Otherwise you will live, and you will die, and fifty years later it will be as though you never had. If you’re ok with nihilism and happy (or unhappy, I guess) to live a pointless life, I probably don’t have to tell you you’re reading something you’ll disagree with. For the rest of us humans, our need for God is universal regardless of how religious or independent we would consider ourselves.

All that separates the faithful from the faithless is acceptance of this need. Not temperament, not IQ, not criminal record or social status. Only by being acutely aware of our hopeless state can we escape it. “Good” or “bad” doesn’t mean a lot in light of the fact that we’re mostly driven by selfishness and entirely unable to prevent ourselves or anyone else from dying at the end. Without God, life is sandcastles too close to the shore and energy wasted fighting the waves. Sure, we can all build something on our own… but not well, and not for long.

Enough with generalization; what about me specifically? I am, after all, the only person I know well enough to write very much about. Am I a better person for seeing my need and giving God control of my life? While I think so, it’s not my doing. And it wasn’t much of a choice, really. I’d consider myself a ‘good’ person, for whatever that is worth, somewhere on the world’s scale between the homeless guy and the billionaire. I’m usually smart, mostly honest, almost always responsible. Why, then, do I need God so much? Because, among other reasons: without him, I’d be crazy.

We’re not talking “boy, that guy’s a little crazy” crazy. I mean more like “have a nervous breakdown, drop out of school and move to Montana to hunt bison” crazy. Seriously. I am insightful, so I’m used to knowing how things – my computer, every electronic device my parents own, gravity, government, communication – work. Fortunately, I’m also intelligent enough to know that this has limits, and that even if I tried (and were a whole lot smarter) I would never understand everything. This tidbit of knowledge serves as an equalizer, with one fatal exception.

Girls. Yes, girls… real original, eh? Not girls in general, because that would just be stupid. Specifically, attractive girls who are nice enough to talk to me and popular enough to usually be talking to someone else. At least since tag on the kindergarten playground, it seems like I’ve usually got one girl or another stuck in my head. By 5th or 6th grade when I’d begun to decide cooties might not be such a bad thing to catch, I’d also realized I was smaller and less talkative than many of the other guys. In a classroom of 30 kids there might be 5 cute girls and 10 boys more popular than me; you do the math. I started thinking about girls more and talking to girls less.

I might go deep into nature vs. nurture, considering whether my character or early experiences were more responsible for making me self-conscious and intimidated. But nature vs. nurture has always bored the crap out of me, so let’s not do that. Fact is, I was shy in general and especially frightened of conversations with cute girls. What does an overly introspective boy do in a situation like this? Why, analyze to death and freak out, of course! To varying degrees, that’s what I’ve been doing since I was 12, and I can’t think of a single time when it’s served me well.

The “varying degrees” part is where God comes in. As I’ve mentioned probably enough to sound like a hugely arrogant nerd, I’m pretty smart. I got good grades in high school without much work. I get decent grades in college with only slightly more work. Given my blessedly encouraging family and friends, and assuming my B.S. snags me a career, what else do I need? I can get an apartment, then a house, then a new car every three years from this chapter until the conclusion, like your average Miami business graduate. By every worldly standard, I’m one good job interview away from being set.

Except for the way I bend myself to breaking over girls. Everything else I’ve needed has fallen into place: college acceptance, test scores, scholarships, summer work, housing, money from my parents for school and from my grandparents for a car. Were it not for girls, these self-centered things would probably be enough for me. I’m smart enough to know how dumb I am, but I don’t know whether I’m humble enough to admit it without extra pressure.

And talk about pressure! From junior high through high school, there was always a handful of girls I thought were really cool, really hot, and really scary. Although this unofficial group’s roll was in a fairly constant state of change, there always was someone I had to prep myself before running into again. At every school or church event, there was someone to whom talking required thorough preparation. I was ever thinking of lines in my head, ever cooking up scenarios that would get me a smile or a laugh or, dare I say it, a date.

If you’ve had to give a presentation or a speech in front of people, you’ve got some idea what this is like. The only thing worse than going in blind and completely unprepared is trying to memorize verbatim what you want to say; speeches don’t have multiple takes. Forget a sentence… a phrase… a word, and you’ve got an instant breakdown with no delay on the camera and everybody watching. This is sort of the way I’ve always felt about girls I’m interested in dating.

Under the weight of stress, stretched expectations, and emotional letdown (let’s just say I regularly forget my lines), I found myself at the end of high school beginning to understand the reasons my parents had always taken me to church. No matter how much better I got at talking to girls, and even if I were to find the right one, romance – this supposed peak of human existence, this glamorized salve for every cut – would be a challenge for me. Analysis is something my brain is always doing, whether I throw myself into it or not, and logic is one persistent beast.

Even the rare girl who is cool and approachable provides feelings that only hint at a more perfect Love. Even sweet girls who are a little too crazy or a little too trendy or a little too sold on the college culture leave me fumbling for words and planning my next moves. Thank God for these feelings. Sometimes I think they are the only stupid things keeping me from giving up on romance altogether. More importantly, I know rejection and broken expectations stab hard enough to make me feel more frequently my need for God.

Am I wrong in seeing this as blatantly amazing? God takes my most vulnerable point, a perpetually unstable aspect of who I am, and forces me to see him through it. I think there’s a reason people often “find” God at their worst, tend to grow closest to Him during the hardest parts of their lives. At any other time, we can get a new car or a new job or a new whatever, slough off/take pills for the depression, pick ourselves up and go on alone. There are certain things, though, we simply cannot get around: these turn us either numb, crazy, or Christian.

The two party system really is an amazing thing. Elected officials have hundreds of different issues to cover during the course of a term, and if consideration of an issue simply cannot fit into their schedule: vote the party line. It sounds pessimistic but we all know this is the way it works – having two parties gives voters the necessary amount of choice without overwhelming the legislature. Can you imagine if there were several major parties, each with a similar amount of power? Every single bill would be filibustered or amended to death. Nothing would ever get done.

At the same time, the two party system is an awfully frightening thing. What if one party drops the ball? I think that’s what we have in America today: the Democratic Party has dropped the ball. I really think it started after their loss in the 2000 Presidential race. I don’t know the big players very well, but was Gore the best they could do in 2000? It seems like a stretch to me, but I guess I can understand; sure the guy was weird and unlikable, but he had been Vice President for 8 years. At any rate, November came, the weirdness trumped the experience, and Al lost.

Now, I would argue that I’ve made only one questionable statement thus far – namely, that the Democrats have dropped the ball. This one I’ll try and justify over the next few paragraphs. A serious part of the problem is that many Democrats would point out a second questionable statement I’ve made: “Al lost.” This is where the breakdown begins. Whether or not Al Gore was the best man the Democrats had to run for President, their reaction to his loss was devastating – not because it was harsh, but because it has lingered in the party for so long. The evidence? John Kerry.

Why, unless they thought Bush was a complete idiot who could not possibly be re-elected, would the Democratic Party run such a straw man? When it comes down to it, there are three issues Americans vote on:

1) The economy. People want money, and they think the President holds all the strings to the stock market and the keys to the vaults.
2) Integrity. Hard-line partisans will vote for their party regardless, but everyone in between wants a candidate they feel they can trust.
3) Iraq. No one wants to send our troops across the ocean to die, but no one wants to live in fear at home.

With Bush’s first term winding down, all of these issues were up for grabs. The economy (1) seemed to be turning around, but not as quickly as anyone would like. The Texas National Guard questions or Haliburton issues (2) could easily be refreshed in voter’s minds. And Iraq (3)… wow. The current situation in the Middle East is probably the most difficult situation any leader has ever faced. How do you address a situation where entire civilizations want you dead, in a time where technology could easily make that wish possible? Certainly, a Democrat could have adopted a convincing anti-war stance.

But now, with October on the horizon, two of the three major issues have effectively been ceded. Can anyone present an argument as to how Kerry might salvage issues (2) and (3)? I certainly cannot. Kerry will and should continue to attack the economy. If he presents something that resembles a plan – it doesn’t have to be fancy, so long as it sounds mildly logical – he can win voters on (1). Integrity, on the other hand, is not Kerry’s strong suit. Why in the world did he spend the summer campaigning on his 4 months in Vietnam? WHY? Kerry’s most notable achievement is his 1971 testimony accusing the American troops of war crimes. Making the generalization that American troops committed atrocities and then basing a Presidential campaign on having been one of those troops is maybe the worst idea I’ve ever heard. Regardless of what Bush/Cheney mistakes and indiscretions the Democrats bring out in the next month, the best they can hope for is a tie on (2).

Finally, Iraq. Regardless of whether Saddam was convincingly connected to al Qaeda, regardless of whether the benefits prove worth the cost, Kerry has no position on Iraq. How can he defend his latest stance when it directly contradicts numerous statements he has made over the last several years? Kerry cannot argue with Bush about Iraq without also arguing with himself. This is linked tightly with the integrity issue; whether you are a hawk or a pacifist or somewhere in the middle, Kerry has shifted around far too much to be trustworthy. No matter how many people hate Bush, and no matter how many people will reflexively vote Democrat, I think Bush will win in November because of Kerry’s horrible inability to win votes on issues (2) and (3).

Recent polls have Democrats angrier still. Why is Kerry behind? Kerry should not be behind! Bush is a liar and a moron and Kerry has much better hair! But if their prescription for Gore failure is to throw in a waaaay left washed up hippie, the Democrats have problems bigger than two consecutive Presidential defeats. Where are the reasonable moderates to straighten these guys out? As much fun as it is laughing about the ridiculousness of Kerry, Edwards, McAuliffe & Co., and as much as I like having a Republican majority in D.C., in the long run nobody benefits from an ineffective Democratic Party.

See, having two and only two major parties is a double-edged sword. Things get done in the federal government, and knowing that the Democrats are watching keeps the Republicans sharp (and vice versa). But when the underlying theme of a Presidential campaign is “Our Candidate: At Least He’s Not Their Candidate,” we’ve got a problem. When we stray so far from the issues that Americans can hardly hear the name-calling under the layers of spin, we’ve got a problem. Earlier in the year, Kerry was proud to be traveling on a platform of issues and values… unfortunately, Kerry appears to lack a human grasp of either.

As much as I want Bush to win, I want to see a competition. I want debates where there are actual thoughts and ideas involved, not arguments over who said X on Tuesday and then insinuated Y on Thursday. I don’t want the major issue in the fall to be one candidate’s flimsiness on the issues. With two parties, there should be intelligent discussion of topics. With two parties, there should be pressure for honesty and excellence coming from the other side. I hope there are sane, respectable Democrats waiting to step into power when the current batch burns out, because a single-party country is not a place I’d like to inhabit. I am proud to be a Republican, but Republican politicians make mistakes and there are some of them who downright scare me. Please DNC, find someone better than Hillary for 2008…

Inspiration for this entry partly from “Profiles In Self-Destruction,” a far better article by Evan Maloney that makes a similar point.

Think of your favorite movie. Now, what is it that makes this movie so great? Unless it’s a comedy where the plot is secondary, more than likely “good” and “evil” are involved (even if it’s a ‘I hope she chooses the guy who’s not a jerk’ chick-flick). And they are not playing nice. My favorite movie, when I’m in too serious a mood for The Princess Bride, is the final entry into the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Talk about an enormously popular series of films… we’re talking worldwide popularity to a degree that’s nearly universal. And what lies at the core of the story? Deceptively imaginary good vs. evil.

It should come as no surprise that this is the sort of movie people will watch again and again. Whether we realize it or not, there is more truth in the Lord of the Rings movies than in every chainsaw massacre, softcore pornography, and annoying documentary film combined. Right and wrong are deeper and stronger than laws or traditions; we know that the honorable should win and the cruel suffer defeat. The special effects are stunning, the acting is great, the directing is masterful – but these are only means to the end. When you watch these movies, you identify with the characters and hope for their safety and rejoice in their victory. Deny it if you will, but you have witnessed possibly the best ever cinematic depiction of the battle between the greatest powers in the universe. And I don’t mean mythological heroes and dungeon monsters.

There are great powers in the universe, and they are greater than nature, and they are as obvious as the sun. Belief in God is popular, but only under the most watery and least reasonable definitions of Him. As plain as movie-screen good versus evil, there are only two paths in life. One of them is with God; the other, without. We can see these only poorly, if at all. Our scientific stubbornness cannot ‘know’ that God exists at all. But should we expect to? A God behind, below, above and beyond the scenes of an everything-sized movie is awfully big. What character, conceived in His mind and drawn by His hand, could possibly understand Him? Would J.R.R. Tolkein’s fictional dwarves and elves, brought to bigscreen life but existing only on film, discs, and paper, have any reason to expect a handshake and signed photograph from the director?

So this is where faith comes in. We fuss and argue about religion until nobody knows what ‘religion’ means, but FAITH… faith is a word that actually makes you think of something. Faith is belief in an incomprehensible “big picture.” It’s something hard to explain, yet simple – either you take a step and have faith, or you do not. Reality does not leave footnote space or empty lines to fill in with an Eastern religion of your choice or a doctored defintion of God. When I say ‘faith’ I mean a thoughtful belief in the God of the Hebrews, the Father of Jesus Christ; the Creator. Everything else I’ve tried was an escape hatch to pride and self-reliance.

I hope you’re with me here. If not, there isn’t much I can do. Read some C.S. Lewis (he was a friend of Tolkein’s, by the way) or meet with a local pastor. Think about why you look at the world the way you do; hold up your favorite alternative to God against the light of an ordered universe complete with thinking, emotional beings. Should you choose atheism or something else, live your life for awhile and honestly consider how that goes. If there’s a point to something as complicated as life, how could it be as bland as ‘to be happy?’ If there’s not a point, how could someone as smart as yourself be so hung up searching for one? Honestly, you may think I’m stupid but scratch out God and you’re missing the show.

Yes, a truly good movie is a great thing. But how sad it would be if that were the greatest thing… a scripted course of events starring a cast of fake characters, all designed to evoke emotions that serve no other purpose. How easily we forget that God is here. His amazing plan is for our greatest good: and every day, we forget. I can glance in awe at the sunrise. I can take in the comforting, powerful words of the Bible. I can enjoy a beautiful song that doesn’t scratch the surface of God’s vast power… all while completely overlooking the facts that I am an adopted son of a God who does not make mistakes or concessions, and that I live in a world poisoned by Evil. Does God love his children? He gives us life and choice, and I can’t think of grander, better gifts. But I shuffle along feeling bored and unimportant 300 days out of the year.

Only once in awhile do I vaguely glimpse the plot. I really don’t know what is planned for me, let alone how I’ll get there. I know enough to see, at last, that Christianity is never a set of rules or a class on self improvement. Following Christ is a doorway opened, not to a quiet pasture or a golden road but to everlasting life… through a world at war. Good is fighting evil, but in our storyline we rarely choose a side or even realize the lines are drawn. I am often burned out because I want to tell my own story, with the entire thing planned and scheduled and padded for safety. I want to serve God, but I’d like to have a 12-step program or something to hold onto.

I should be holding onto God instead. This is GOD we’re talking about here. Outside of time, space, every other thing that restricts us. Awesome and creative and loving enough to put romance deep in our hearts. He made this world and if He chooses, He can unmake it. He will not die: at the perfect time, God will conquer. Think back to Return of the King and try to picture the horrifying odds; while enjoying the outcome, remember the theological relevance and beauty of that miraculous final victory. I cannot imagine – I cannot begin to imagine – the unbelievable God I claim to know, but I conveniently assume He’ll take care of me while I do my thing and try to be nice. This is not true.

In appreciating the good we must not forget the evil. Every day can bring me nearer life, or nearer death. If I insist on standing still, it will not be long before I’m shaken. I will try to ignore it, but many times I’ll have to choose: trust God to lift me forward again, or trust myself and fall to useless pride? Life lies at the handle of a bright but heavy sword, offered selflessly to undeserving hands. Dare you turn away and deny your loving King? Will you draw, but fight only for selfish glory? Darkness creeps in powerfully and in many forms. To share in victory, we must kneel and grasp Truth with a humble warrior’s heart. Not merely in one dramatic instant, but throughout our lives, as battles rage both inside and out.

it’s hard to write when the only point i feel like getting across is that i haven’t got much worth saying. i like to write but can only do it well when i’ve got something good that i have to get down before it slips out of my mind. there is an article i originally considered weeks ago and would love to throw together to post right now. there’s a lot i might say but i don’t know how and right now, it’s just not there. it probably will be later, when i’m trying to fall asleep, and i hate that. i have ideas to get across and a desire to do so and yet… nothing.

this must be that nagging reminder of my insufficiency, creeping up on me again. nagging in the same way a lion is a nagging reminder to the antelope that he’s tired and is about to be eaten. i feel my inability when i first wake up in the morning: soo… a day of class, and i’ll talk to maybe three people outside this house, and probably put off what little work i should do, and then repeat. soon the usual distractions get the day spinning, but again when i go to bed i remember that i’m useless at doing anything worthwhile. on my own, i am just another loser writing because i’m not good at much else. if i get my joy from cool music, a decent essay, or some new website feature, i will never stay happy for long. i may as well devote my life to a 4.0 or weekends of ignorant drunken bliss or a continuous cool-guy popularity act (or do the Miami thing and try all three at once). it’s true – my acutely incomplete belief in God does not give me immunity from distractions or depression.

my attitude is not good. it’s not terrible, and i will be ok, and if i were more stubborn i could probably live out my time here in my current mindset. even when i do move on, i will never get over my pride in my intelligence and creativity. i will never stop trying to be independent of my Creator. i can’t say for certain, because i’ve never been an alcoholic or a prostitute, but i’ll assume that my insistence on being insightful is just as spiritually hazardous. as long as i keep trying to accomplish and communicate and persuade as ends in themselves, i’ll have chosen to be stagnant – my attitude will stay “not good.” only when i look to God for my inspiration, only when i keep him in the front of my mind more often, will anything i do benefit myself and others.

and isn’t that the idea?